there's a strange phenomenon that happens when you have a significant other.  it seems that when you are single, noone wants you but as soon as you're "taken", people come out of the woodwork.  i don't understand it but it seems fairly universal... and i had an experience with it today.  i'm usually pretty oblivious to guys flirting with me.  i guess that when i have a boyfriend, i don't pay much attention to other guys.  either that or it's the inferiority complex that i've pretty much always had... i just don't assume that any guy is interested in me so i don't expect any flirting.  it could also have to do with the fact that i've always had WAY more guy friends than girl friends.  i see guys as buddies for the most part.  i'm used to being "just one of the guys". 

i guess i'm searching for a reason why i was so surprised & shocked by what happened.  i mean, it really wasn't that big a deal, not like i was molested or anything.  so, what happened was this:  [this has been edited to prevent the guy in question from being embarrassed.  i write about what i'm thinking but that's no reason to make anyone else uncomfortable].  i did something nice for a guy.  i made sure to tell him very early in our conversations that i have a boyfriend that i love very much.  it's been days since i did the nice favor, it's forgotten.  well, today i had the web cam on for randy (got it working!  yay!) and this guy wants to see it.  i say no, i'm talking to my boy.  then he says something to the effect of "he's really far away & i'm right here".  wha?  huh?  how?  where'd that come from?  i thought i had made myself perfectly clear from the get go!  i didn't know what to say.  finally i came up with "he's my boyfriend & you aren't".  that musta worked cuz he didn't have a come-back.

maybe the reason i was so shocked is that i absolutly do not cheat.  i guess there are girls out there who would go for the booty call while their guy is overseas.  but i'm not one of those girls.  i guess i wasn't so much shocked as offended.  i think it's pretty rude to say something like that when he knows i have a boyfriend.  i guess he could have been just kidding or trying to be funny...

so what is it that makes someone seem more attractive when they are already in a relationship?  are you more relaxed when you aren't trying to flaunt your plumage & strut to attract a mate?  maybe that relaxed demeanor is attractive.  maybe it's the thrill of competition.  maybe some people have no respect.  maybe i'm making a big deal out of nothing...